THE DISTANCE BETWEEN OUR HEARTS

# THE DISTANCE BETWEEN OUR HEARTS

*By William S. Becker*

Five days remain, and my heart's already there,  

Among all my brothers, united in prayer.  

But my pockets are empty, no wheels to ride,  

And a thousand miles stand between me and their side.

I've suffered through losses, through anguish and pain,  

But this kind of longing cuts deeper again.  

For I don't seek riches, or pleasures, or fame,  

Just to sit with my brothers and call out His Name.

To lower my head, to annul what I am,  

To give them my heart, not a piece, but the man.  

To stand in their circle, with nothing to hide,  

And feel all our hearts beating as one inside.

God damn this distance, this helpless despair,  

To know where my heart lives, yet not to be there.  

No money, no car, just these tears that I cry,  

While the world keeps on turning, indifferent to why.

But love knows no borders, no highways, no walls,  

And the heart of a brother still hears when one calls.  

So I'll give them my longing, my sorrow, my pain,  

And pray that their unity blossoms like rain.

Let them rise higher, though I cannot attend,  

Let my broken heart serve every brother and friend.  

And if I must remain here, alone and apart,  

Then let them all gather **inside my heart.**

For the Creator knows what these tears are worth,  

When a man wants connection more than all of this earth.  

And though I can't hold them, or look in their eyes,  

**I'll carry their love till the day that I rise.**

**And if my heart breaks, let it break for them all,  

For love is the reason I answered His call.**

A Carpet Beneath Their Feet

 "A Carpet Beneath Their Feet"

I did not come to stand above,

Or claim the highest place in love.

I came to bow, to bend, to kneel,

To lift my friends beyond what I feel.

Let them walk upon my pride,

Let every selfish thought subside.

I'll be the carpet beneath their feet,

If through my love, their souls can meet.

What good is wisdom locked inside,

While brothers suffer from my pride?

What good are prayers that fill the air,

If I refuse their burdens to bear?

The ego screams, "You must be first!"

But that is where the heart is cursed.

For every time I demand my way,

I push the light of love away.

So break my arrogance, strip it bare,

Until there's nothing left but care.

Not for the honor, not for the crown,

But for the strength to bow me down.

We do not need to think the same,

Or wear one face, or speak one name.

Our differences are not the wall,

But opportunities to rise above them all.

And when disturbances shake the ground,

When love seems lost and cannot be found,

We'll hold each other through the night,

And turn our darkness toward the light.

For every blow the ego brings,

Another chance for the heart to sing.

Another chance to choose the friend,

Another wall of separation to end.

I'll give my strength when yours is gone,

You'll lift me up when I can't go on.

And through the concessions that we make,

A single heart begins to wake.

Until no brother stands alone,

No separate kingdom, no selfish throne.

Just one desire, one common plea,

That all my friends rise higher than me.

And at the threshold, bruised and worn,

A different kind of life is born.

Not through the strength of flesh or mind,

But through the love we build and bind.

Then what was hidden starts to show,

A world the selfish heart can't know.

And in the vessel between us all,

We hear the Creator's loving call.

So let me be the lowest stone,

Upon which every friend has grown.

For when their hearts together rise,

The upper worlds open before our eyes.

And if my friends attain that height,

Then every wound was worth the fight.

For I have found what I came to be—

A servant of love, where all are free.

THE PLACE WHERE LOVE IS BORN

  

We came together broken, each carrying his own,  

A thousand selfish wishes, a heart of hardened stone.  

We thought we'd find the Creator somewhere in the skies,  

But He was waiting patiently between our blinded eyes.

We lived our lives in searching, through pleasure, grief, and pain,  

Through wives and sons and daughters, through sunshine and the rain.  

Yet everything we gathered, and everything we'd known,  

Revealed a deeper hunger that none could fill alone.

We came to love our brothers, but found our hearts were cold,  

Our pride was worth a fortune, yet our love was cheaply sold.  

We spoke of love and giving, while calculating gain,  

And wondered why our prayers returned unanswered once again.

We pointed at each other, at everything they'd done,  

Until we saw the enemy was hiding in each one.  

Not in the hearts of others, nor somewhere far away,  

But in the selfish nature that we battle every day.

And every crack between us, each wound we learn to see,  

Becomes a place to ask for love, for what we long to be.  

For none can build the Shechina with selfish hands alone,  

It rises from our common prayer, where hearts become as one.

So let me bow before you, my brothers of the Ten,  

And when my pride comes roaring, I'll bow to you again.  

Not because I'm worthy, not because I'm strong,  

But because without your loving hearts, I'll never move along.

We do not seek perfection, nor crowns upon our heads,  

We seek the love of others, where our selfish nature dreads.  

And when we find we're helpless, with nothing left to give,  

We turn toward the Creator, who teaches us to live.

For lowly is the creature, yet glorious is the call,  

To build a place between us where His love embraces all.  

Not ten separate wishes, each pleading to be free,  

But one united longing for the love we cannot see.

So break this heart of selfishness, but leave its fire alive,  

And turn its burning hunger toward the friends for whom we strive.  

Let every breath be given, let every prayer be true,  

Until the love between us reveals the One in You.

We came together broken, but now we understand,  

The Creator brought us here to take each other's hand.  

For where our hearts surrender, where selfish wishes cease,  

The Shechina finds a dwelling, and our souls discover peace.

**We did not come to find Him in some distant world above,  

We came to build the vessel where He reveals His love.**

EVEN IF YOU DON'T SAVE ME

 

 “EVEN IF YOU DON'T SAVE ME”

Inspired by Rabash — Confidence (1986)

I stood before the furnace flame,

With nothing left but Your great Name.

If You deliver, I will stand,

If not, my heart is still in Your hand.

I begged for mercy, begged for light,

Demanded You make wrong things right.

But confidence is not my will,

It's trusting You when all is still.

My selfish heart demands its pay,

For every kindness sent Your way.

Two authorities cannot be one,

Until the work of self is done.

The King needs nothing I can give,

Yet serving Him is why I live.

Not for reward, not for my gain,

But love that rises through the pain.

Each prayer reveals a deeper need,

Each tear becomes a planted seed.

The empty vessel learns to cry,

For strength to bestow, not reasons why.

The שכינה lies beneath the dust,

Where love feels bitter and faith must trust.

Exile reveals the chains I wear,

Redemption begins with a desperate prayer.

The screen restrains what I would take,

So love can give for Your dear sake.

From Pharaoh's grip to freedom's land,

I place my will within Your hand.

And if You never answer my way,

I'll trust Your wisdom anyway.

For confidence is not what You do—

It's wanting nothing but to bestow on You.

BREAK THE BEAST, SET LOVE FREE

Inspired by Rabash, Article No. 42 (1991)

I fed the beast till my soul ran dry,

Gave him the earth, and he wanted the sky.

I offered him love, he demanded a price,

Turned every blessing to cold sacrifice.

He screamed for pleasure, he begged for more,

While truth stood bleeding outside my door.

I called myself righteous, I called myself wise,

While feeding a monster disguised in lies.

The ox knows its master, the donkey its feed,

But I chased the hunger of selfish need.

I wanted Your greatness displayed in the light,

But You gave me faith in the dead of the night.

I cursed the darkness, I cursed the fall,

Never once seeing Your love through it all.

For every descent that shattered my pride,

Was showing the beast I was keeping inside.

So break me of greed, but don't break my heart,

Tear every selfish intention apart.

Strip me of payment, of glory and fame,

Till nothing remains that demands in Your name.

I don't want heaven for serving You well,

Nor fear of punishment dragging me through hell.

I want to bestow when there's nothing to gain,

To love through the darkness, the silence, the pain.

And when my old nature comes begging for pay,

I'll tell that old bastard to get out of my way!

For truth is my compass, and love is my guide,

And faith is the strength when my reason has died.

I'll stand with my brothers, whatever may come,

Till ten beating hearts become beating as one.

No payment, no bargain, no selfish decree,

Just love for the others, and love setting me free.

So send me the darkness, I'll search for Your light,

Send me the struggle, I'll stay in the fight.

For even the fall can awaken my plea,

To give without taking—that's freedom to me!

And when I have nothing, no pleasure, no claim,

I'll still raise my heart and rejoice in Your name.

Not because You rewarded the suffering in me,

But because I can love without asking a fee.

THE SPIES WON'T LET ME PRAY

THE SPIES WON'T LET ME PRAY

An original poem inspired by Rabash

I stood before the King today,

But all my thoughts got in the way.

The spies inside began to shout,

"There's nothing here! Turn back! Get out!"

My heart was cold, my eyes were blind,

A thousand doubts ran through my mind.

I tried to give, but all I knew,

Was taking everything for me, not You.

I bowed my head, I closed my eyes,

And heard the truth beneath the lies.

I don't need gold, I don't need fame,

I need a heart that burns for Your name.

The dust was thick beneath my feet,

The taste of giving wasn't sweet.

But in that dust, I came to see,

The only thing that's missing is me.

Not who I am, but who I'll be,

When love replaces all of me.

So take this heart, and make it new,

Until there's nothing left but You.

WHEN THE FACE IS HIDDEN

By William S. Becker

I cried to Heaven, but silence came,

I cursed the darkness and called it by name.

I gave my heart, yet received only pain,

And wondered what love had left to gain.

I watched the wicked rise with pride,

While those who loved Him were cast aside.

The liars prospered, the faithful fell,

And my heart became its own private hell.

I begged for mercy, I begged for light,

But every prayer disappeared in the night.

I thought He'd abandoned the world and me,

And left us chained where we couldn't be free.

But who was it crying, demanding reward?

Who measured the love of the living Lord?

It was my ego, demanding its share,

Refusing to love without something there.

The first concealment had covered His Face,

The second had stolen all sense of His grace.

Yet even the darkness could not erase,

The hidden invitation to seek His embrace.

I turned to my brothers, with nothing to give,

And found in their hearts a new way to live.

Not asking for comfort, or riches above,

But strength to bestow without payment for love.

And there in the darkness, the truth became clear,

The Face wasn't absent because of my fear.

My vessels were changing, my heart learned to see,

That love wasn't something He owed unto me.

So break this damn ego, let selfishness fall,

Let love for my brothers rise over it all.

For the Good Who Does Good has never withdrawn,

And through our connection, we welcome the dawn.