Psalms In The Heart

  The Gate Was Never Locked the thoughts are not the crime its not blocking them in time the desires are not at fault its not locking them in a vault the crime is saying this is me confusing noise with identity the crime is crowning every scream and calling ego truth supreme the mind throws stones the heart takes blows the ego grins it always knows how to accuse how to pretend then sell the wound as who I am a thought appears unasked unclean a flash of dark a brutal scene that alone is not the fall the fall is trusting it at all desire burns it wants the crown it wants me flat it wants me down but wanting is not where I break I break when I agree and take the block is not the inner storm the block is naming it the norm the lock is not the urge that cries the lock is buying all its lies the ego says this proves your state you’re late you’re weak you sealed your fate the soul says stand don’t run don’t fight just aim the heart above the sight I do not wrestle thought or lust I do not...

 The Guard At The Gate I cursed the wall I could not climb Said ego stole my prayer and time I swung at shadows, fought the dark Blamed every bruise on missed the mark I said the gate was slammed shut tight That heaven hid itself from sight I screamed “You block me!” loud and wild Like a betrayed and starving child The ego laughed but never lied It said “I guard what burns inside If I step back before you’re ready You’ll shatter fast — not slow and steady” I wanted love without the grind Connection cheap, no change of mind But love don’t grow where comfort stays It’s born in fire, delay, and gray So ego pressed me to the wall Not out of hate — but lest I fall It held the weight I couldn’t bear Until I learned to ask — not tear Each failure drilled me into prayer Each fall exposed another layer Each block was mercy dressed as pain Each no was yes in deeper grain I saw at last with broken pride The ego stood right by my side A brutal guard with gentle aim Breaking the vessel — not th...

  3 H's On A Texas Road To open one’s heart is a dangerous thing It needs the Three H’s to give it a sting Hitbatlute hits first, it cuts to the bone Annulment of self, you stand alone No crown, no opinion, no right to be smart Just dust in the hands of a merciful art Bend your neck low, let the ego depart There’s no other gate to a truthful start Then Hitkalelute comes crashing inside Inclusion with friends, nowhere to hide Their lack is your lack, their cry is your sin A heart gets no rest when the many move in You fall into them, not warm, not clean Scraped by their mirrors, exposed and seen But somewhere in that mutual pain A new kind of strength begins to remain Then Hitpahalute quietly appears Enlivened hearts stitched together with tears Not joy from reward, not fire from pride But life that awakens when self has died The heart starts to beat with a rhythm not mine One pulse, one hunger, one shared design No longer asking what’s in it for me Just living inside what we’re mea...