Psalms In The Heart

BROKEN FIRST Broken first, I learned to cry From self to dust, I asked not why When lack got real, the heavens moved And through that pain—the heart was proved I came in full of teeth and pride A throne of self I held inside Certain my hands could force the gate But iron hearts don’t enter straight So down I fell through reason’s floor Each answer died, then died once more The mind grew weak, the body screamed And all I built came unstitched seams I cursed the dark, I cursed the flame Till both revealed—they spoke my name Not to destroy, but strip the lie That lives each time I ask “for why?” The ten stood near like mirrors hard Not praising wounds, not dropping guard They showed me what I could not see— The cruelest cage… was only me I begged for love but sought control I spoke of truth while hiding soul I wanted light to fill my cup Yet would not break the bottom up Then exile dug its fingers deep No borrowed strength, no stolen sleep And from that pit where pride was slain A ...

 I was born inside a system vast, So perfect—future, present, past. A woven force no eye can trace, Yet every breath reveals its place. Not chaos. Not mistake. Not chance. But law so pure all worlds must dance. A single Thought, a force bestowed, That built the path each soul must road. First came the hunger—to receive, A crafted lack so we believe. Not curse, not flaw, not shameful scar, But vessel built to seek afar. For what is Light if none should crave? What is the Gift if none can save? Bestowal formed creation’s sea, But built the need through you and me. The will to take—our nature’s core, The empty knock upon the door. Yet Kabbalah reveals the key: The flaw’s not thirst—but “only me.” For here’s the work most never see: To shape desire intentionally. Not kill the will, nor cast aside, But raise its use, correct its pride. To take this vessel, cracked and wild, And aim it like a faithful child. Not for myself, not fleeting gain, But to return Love back again. Through...

 THE TWO KINGS WITHIN Inside my chest two rulers fight One sells me dark, One calls me light One says “Take more, this world is mine” One whispers “Rise… your will align” The body bows where habit leads To ego’s throne, to selfish needs And every time I seek the King The serpent wakes with sharper sting For Pharaoh grows when truth draws near He builds through doubt, through pain, through fear He shows me all I’ve yet to mend So suffering becomes a friend Idol worship lives inside When self alone becomes my guide Not stone or gold—but “me” on high The cruelest false god money can’t buy So Torah is not words we say But war through every living day Who rules this heart? Who wears the crown? The one I lift… or drag back down And when I see how far I’ve gone How weak by night, how false by dawn That pain itself becomes the gate A cry for truth… before too late For evil grows when I choose right Not to destroy—but bring to light That I may know what must be burned So all desire can be r...

We were not gathered here by chance Each heart was called to join this dance A spark alone can fade from sight But joined as one—we build the light Your voice, your step, your place is real Together broken hearts can heal Kab nights, meetings, hand in hand We rise as one, we firmly stand Don’t wait outside while others start You are a living piece of heart So come, my brothers, take your place And help us build this bond of grace

 They say “I’m tired”… but tired from what From feeding the fire that leaves the soul to rot We scroll, we stall, we say “next time” While the heart grows weak and forgets the climb The ego speaks soft— “Just stay in your chair” “Tomorrow will come… there’s still time there…” But tomorrow steals what today could ignite And one missed spark can delay the Light I’m not begging you— I’m crying inside We are souls meant to walk, not hide The Congress calls, the Ten needs your flame Without you here—we’re not the same So break what binds you, rise from the dust Come not for comfort—come because you must For the Creator waits where friends unite And one true step can change your night

I brought my heart, you called it trash Didn’t even read—just burned the ash I sang for souls, not for applause But cold replies revealed the flaws I gave a gift, you mocked the hand Like love of friends you’d never planned If we can’t hear a brother’s cry Then tell me—are we dead inside? Read me—or bury me Lift me—or murder me But don’t stand there preaching love While crushing hearts that rise above קרא לי או קבור אותי הרם אותי או שבור אותי אל תדבר על אהבת חברים אם אתה שורף לבבות מבפנים This ain’t ‘bout songs, this ain’t ‘bout me It’s who we claim we want to be A ten ain’t built by empty words But by how pain and love are heard So if my gift don’t fit your way At least respect the price I pay Cause one who gives and gets denied Still bleeds to keep the flame alive Read me—or bury me Lift me—or murder me But don’t stand there preaching light While dimming brothers in the night קרא לי או קבור אותי הרם אותי או שבור אותי אם אין מקום ללב חבר איך יבוא האור ויתגבר

I Rode With Reason For years I let my own mind drive Trusted its lies to stay alive It weighed each step, it judged each fall But never knew the King at all It said use thought, protect your skin Take what makes your body grin “God gave you reason—use it well” Yet led me closer still to hell Then came a war inside my chest A higher call disturbed my rest A whisper cut through pride and fear “Bow down… the King of Kings is here” So now I tell this mind of mine You were useful… for your time But from this day you are not throne This heart will serve the King alone Above all thought, above all sight I choose the path beyond my light Faith like fire, raw and true Not what I think—but serving You The head feels heavy, ego cries It fears the place where selfhood dies But in that weight… a gate appears The crown is built through fought-back tears I lose my rule… and strangely rise Not by my own, but Heaven’s eyes For when I kneel above what’s known The burdened head becomes His throne